NEW RPG: The SQUIRTLES THE F^&*%e^% SQUIRTLES!

(Jt)
JT stepped out onto the red martian surface, his ninja boots sinking only slightly into the rusty dirt, gravity having even less bearing on him than on earth. He breathed in deeply the nonexistant air, being that ninjas can breathe in space, and looked skyward at the sun he was so used to seeing from so much closer. Earth, he thought, has never felt more like home.
(jonny)
jt was being watched, though as a ninja he was fully aware of this and the camera was actually focused on a cardboard cutout at this stage. Regardless, the camera was focused on something ninja-shaped and this was of great interest to the entity on the other end of the camera.

Reclining in a massive swivel chair was a huge, turtle-like creature. It had blue skin, a heavy brown shell, and polished iron cannons protruding from each shoulder . A top hat was perched jauntily atop his head and a monocle was screwed into one eye. A goatee also sprouted daringly from the creature's chin.

The creature, whose name was Dr Dino McSilverblast, was focusing intently on a wall of television screens across part of a wide, circular room. The room was dark with light coming only from various screens and lights winking softly behind the good doctor. Behind him, a handful of Squirtles scurried around on errands and checking viewscreens.

Dr Dino McSilverblast stroked his chin and pressed a button on the arm of his chair. "Captain Wartortle: assemble a team of Squirtles and suit up. We have a visitor....a man who could be just what we need".
(jt)
JT looked over the incomparable precipice of the lofty Olympus Mons, contemplating the descent. The mountain's fire had long ago been silenced, the ages dimming its glory only slightly. This was, after all, still the largest volcano in the entire solar system. JT leaned his head back, listening to the shivering silence: all the dust storms Mars could muster could not reach him here, he felt. As he raised his eyes again, he beheld Deimos as it briefly passed in front of the distant sun. How did I get here? he wondered, for the first time since he had found himself on this silent planet. Am I alone?
(someguy)
"Hey JT" said a voice behind him.

The ninja quickly pulled out his sword and swerved to face the man, but it only turned out to be his friend, Someguy, with his overly large sunglasses hiding mysterious eyes and his dojo outfit which was held by his black kung fu belt. There seemed to be washed out blood stains on the outfit from previous fights. And since he can't breathe in space like ninjas, he had a small air mask covering his mouth and nose. He smiled, tossed his brown hair away from his eyes and said:

"Put the sword away, JT, I don't like being threaten by a ninja. But can you tell me where we are and what we're doing here? Or more importantly, how we got here?"
(Jt)
The solemn ninja sheathed his blade and regarded his comrade who, it seemed, had also been transported to the Red Planet mysteriously. "I don't know," he said, completely truthfully. He looked again over the edge of the mountain's enormous caldera rim; the mountain's base was beyond the horizon, even at this height. "I have been wandering here many days."

Suddenly, a wisp of carbon-dioxide ice, the only type of cloud which could reach to this height, three times that of Mt. Everest, brushed past the two, disturbing the eerie stillness at the planet's peak. "I do not trust this quiet, however," the ninja remarked
(Someguy)
"Neither do I" said someguy, as the cloud overtook both warriors. He looked at the ninja, but all he could see now was his figure. The cloud was dense.

Suddenly, a movement occurred to his right. He turned, quick enough to see another figure pass by, but it was gone.

"JT, I don't think this cloud was simple coincidence. And I don't think we're as alone as we thought."

The boy placed himself in a defensive position, and looked around for any sign of movement.
(jt)
Something in the Martian air triggered JT's ninja sense, and he too assumed a defensive stance, his sword once again drawn, condensation forming quickly over the blade's length in the chill of the thin atmosphere. "I once thought Mars a dead planet, yet now I sense we are not the only living things here."

JT motioned through the fog for someguy to stay close, lest they get separated. A nod signaled that his message was understood, and with cautious steps they moved along the mountain's rim. Suddenly, the air before them began to eddy and whirl. Sensing the immediate danger, JT dropped to the ground, pulling his companion with him. They were only just in time, for something like a circular saw blade materialized just above them and would surely have shortened them by a head, were it not for JT's ninja reflexes. JT was just about to destroy the deadly obstacle with his sword, when it vanished into the mist. The two stood once again, now coated on their elbows and knees with a fine layer of red dust.

"Let us leave this place," JT suggested. Grabbing someguy by the collar, he leaped from the mountainside, the weak gravity of Mars only just managing to keep him from becoming a satellite. When the two finally began to descend once more, they were a considerable distance down the volcano's dome-shaped slope. They landed gently, kicking up small dust clouds, and continued their descent.
(jonny)
Before they could take another step, however, a handful of short figures surrounded them. It was hard to make out what they were since they were encased in heavy space suits, but a curly tail protruded from each one.

A slightly taller character, with the name WARTORTLE sewn on his chest, stepped forward. "Good evening. I think it would be benenficial if you came with us now".
[bowen: "Perhaps in different thread?" said a voice "I mean, it's your lives, your STORY, but still... Different thead? Or Different title? Just to avoid confusion."
The being who said this wondered why he didn't insert this in brackets, itstead of saying it, and promptly destroyed itself.] [taco: inserts brackets there for ya bud]
(Someguy)
Someguy looked at the creatures. The "Wartortle" must obviously be the leader of the small group, seeing how he is different than the others. Someguy, who learned the hard way that you can't trust others, stared at the leader and asked:

"Where will you take us?"

"Our Lord has summoned you two to him right away." replied the creature.

"And what if we refuse?" said the ninja

"Then we'll have to take you in by force"

The group of creatures came in closer to the ninja and the boy.
(jt)
JT's expression became grave. In this low-oxygen atmosphere, his ninja fire would not be very effective. However, ninjas always carry more than one weapon.

In the distance, a rumble began, and a shadow grew upon the horizon. "A sandstorm approaches," JT said to the creatures surrounding him and someguy. "Do you think you can outrun it?"

Not waiting for an answer, he drew his ninja blade and with it threw up a large cloud of rusty dust in a full-circle arc. With this momentary distraction, he grabbed someguy's collar and once again performed a leap that would impress even John Carter, carrying the two several miles away in the low Martian gravity, further away from the approaching storm. "Not far enough," JT said, as a flash of static lightning tore through the storm's silhouette on the horizon.
(Jonny)
The doctor shook a fist angrily at the screen: his cameras were scattered across the entire planet. "Those damn ninjas. Perhaps there's a way to have them spayed. Gary!"

A small Squirtle materialised by Jonny's side.

"Is it possible to neutralise ninjas? Preferably with some sort of aerosol?"

"I don't know, sir, it's not something we've ever really-"

"Get to work researching it! We must track down this duo immediately".

((Also, we should probably move this to another thread for organisation's sake.))
Taco: Oh ok if u insist, evil blastoise

"Not far enough," someone said as Tuomey cooked some chicken in the underground cave he'd blasted out after waking up on some dusty red place where he needed magic to breath, nearly taking his arm off in the process - the staff was backfiring again.
He climbed up the entrance shaft, pushed away the rock and saw JT and someguy standing there.

"Hi guys." he said and continued, noticing the crazy sandstorm, "Nice weather we're having. Chicken?"

"Tuomey? What are you doing here? And sure, I am starting to get hungry." said someguy.

He grabs a chicken leg and sniffs it. Tuomey stares at his movement, and someguy replies:

"No offense man, I have an old habit of sniffing my food for traces of poison before eating, and, you know, old habits die hard...and it smells good."

He bites into the chicken leg and looks to where the creatures were.

"I wonder what were those things, and what did their "Lord" want with us..."

"What creatures? What? Let's dicuss this over a nice warm whiskey." Tuomey led his two friends into the cave, dropping the rock atop the entrance, and they informed each other on current events, safe from the storm.

((Waiting for all and sundry to join, really))

At the other side of rock threshold, the door comprised of multicoloured beads, Esbby lay in his nest unaware of any events around him. A roaring fire blared beside him, and a cup of unfinished, lukewarm Cocoa.
His appearance hadn't changed since the last adventure, and he was just as small (and adorable) as usual. He snoozed away happily.

((We're back in the saddle, baby!))

Doctor Dino McSilverblast leaned back in his chair thinking. The motley collection of individuals scattered across the planet had no recollection of how they arrived, which was very interesting indeed. But they were powerful and the doctor wished to acquire them for his various schemes. Tapping a few buttons, he established a communications link with his Squirtle attack force.

"Would you kindly move to Sector P1KA? Some sort of electric mouse is cooking chicken there".

((I am going to knock up a bitchin picture for this RPG btw))

Though he was in a state of slumber at the time, his semi-concious brain picked up the words 'Cooking' & 'Chicken'. The former was more important, he discerned, as he didn't eat much chicken these days, but he was a big fan of gastronomy. So with little persuasion, he broke out of his sleep, leapt up, stretched and ran out of his little room into the Parlour.
But he hesitated as he saw an abundance of people in conversation and cooking.
He dashed back into his room, his heart beating fast. He'd never seen some of these people before. However, he did see they seemed to be making polite conversation about them. He took a few inhales before bucking up the confidence to push through the bead-door and make an entrance.
"...Hiya." He said very quietly before dashing under a sofa quickly hoping nobody had noticed.

Someguy was gleefully eating his roasted chicken and telling Tuomey about what happened so far when suddenly a small, blue figure opened the door, said "hiya" and dashed under the couch. The room fell silent for a small while. Someguy looked under the couch and saw a small, furry creature shaking with fear. For a while, he was wondering if he was one of those things that attacked him outside, but then he realized that the face looked different, and he didn't seem very threatening. Besides, they were 3 against 1.

"Hey guys, check it out, there's some little creature under there. He looks hungry." someguy took a small piece of chicken and showed it the newcomer. "If you want it, you'll have to come out..."

(Jonny, I cant wait for that pic to show up. HURRY UP WITH IT)

JT looks around the cave. He was distrustful of the chicken for several reasons. Firstly, how would one cook anything on Mars, except by exposing it to the cosmic radiation of the daytime sun? Second, it seemed a bit overdone. He ninja-politely declined the meal offer. "We have met more danger than the Martian weather," he said to Tuomey.

Suddenly, the rumble of the sandstorm's passage could be felt better than it could be heard; sparse atmosphere makes for sparse sound. "This storm may last for several days," JT said. "Are there any other exits? We should seal them." []

(still awaiting the perfect moment, btw, i'm not ignoring this, NOT THIS TIME!)

Tuomey looked up from his chicken. "There're no other exits, but I can make some in a while. Wizardry: Not actually that easy - but hey, air generating is pretty sweet. Oh, and the chicken is fine, you can eat it - magic fire, you see." he said, gesturing at the green and blue tinged flames. "...any magical side affects will be minor but try to avoid building up too much static electricity for a day or two." he continued, making some tea.

"So, uh, these blue turtle dudes.. What have we annoyed and how and why? Did they bring us here? Or their leaders?"

"None of us know, really..." said someguy, still teasing the creature with chicken. "All we know is that they have some kind of Lord, and he'd like to see us for some reason."

Just then, the newcomer takes this opportunity to take the chicken from someguy's hand and sneaks back under the couch.

The storm took a few days to pass. The creature under the couch started to trust the others long enough to get out of the couch and introduce itself as Esbiate. He didn't look like he knew the turtle creatures or their lord, thought. During the night, Tuomey slept in his bed, someguy on one couch and Esbiate on another. JT didn't sleep and instead spent his nights reading, because everyone knows ninjas need little sleep and enjoy complicated literature. Other than that, not a lot of things happened while the storm passed.

When the storm was over, Esbiate went to the door and said

"Well, it's been a nice stay and some nice chicken, but now I gotta go back to my nap. Thanks for everything ;3 "

He opened the door, went out, but came back in just seconds later, closing the door tightly.

"There's those blue turtle things outside!!" he exclamed, "They've surrounded the house!"

As he quivered under the sofa, he tried to regain himself by taking deep yet quiet breaths. He knew he shouldn't have gone in; he was just too intimidated.
But as quickly as he had ducked and covered under the sofa, somebody had already pulled up the covering and held a piece of chicken in front of it.
He was skeptical at first, but the idea occurred to him that these people might be friendly, so he stuck out a paw and slowly reached for the chicken, but as soon as he touched it, both his paw and the chicken retracted. In shock, he recoiled under the sofa and curled up, quite frightened.
Breathing heavier this time, he managed to poke his tail out from underneath to feel about the outside. Nothing much apart from the ground. Or so he thought.

The Squirtle Squad had indeed surrounded the cave, though they had been advised to exercise extreme caution. The elctric mouse doodad could easily short out their life-support systems and the doctor really, REALLY didn't want to bring out the Koffing Task Force again. The smell would remain in the upholstery for weeks.

Therefore, the squad were going to use a more subtle approach. They had brought with them a small metal sphere, about 10cm in diameter. After being activated, it would unfold into a small flying probe that would penetrate the cave and relay back video information regarding who was inside. Obviously any ninjas in the area would notice it but that couldn't be helped.

5 minutes later, a metal object was flying towards the cave.

JT's ninja senses caused him to look up from his book — Phonotactics and Cadence of Ancient Westron — as he felt a strange object boring through the rock above the cave. "They are making their own door, it seems," he said. Looking over to the seemingly jaundiced wizard, he said, "Can you sense its presence? Whatever they are sending, it is not alive. Probably metal." Suddenly, he had an idea. "Have you any power over magnetism, wizard?" []

"Hmm.. I can probably induce some sort of electro magnetic field.. Should I draw it in or send it away or disable it? It could be some sort of scouting machine, come to see us. Or a robotic bomb of some kind." Tuomey said, putting down his chicken and fiddling with the settings on his staff.
"I suppose I'll disable it as it breaks through the rock." he continued, sighting along his staff to where the machine was beginning to cut through.

As it broke through there was an instant in which a camera seemed to glare at the various beings in cave and then a blast of silvery-blue lightning flew from the tip of the staff, shorting all the machine's circuits and causing Tuomey to drop the staff and suck his fingers.

"Godsdammit! Well, we have acquired a disabled drone of some kind. What now?"

"Well, we could reprogram it and use it as a spying tool of some kind..." suggested someguy.

JT knelt over the broken mechanism searchingly. He drew out a handheld ninja holo-corder and ran a ninja diagnostic. Ninjas are very scientific. "It was a probe of some kind," he announces. "It is possible they have reason to be more cautious than they want us to think." He walked toward the still-sealed cave entrance. "When I open the door, can you create a large gust of wind, enough to create a small, localized sand vortex?" []

(ninja diagnostic lol)

Dewmann pounded on the hood of the vehicle. It was experiencing some kind of problem caused by the recent storm, but he wasn't tech savvy enough to figure it out. He had no idea why he was on Mars, no idea what was going on, and, worst of all to him, no idea if anyone else, friend or foe was there with him.
He woke up in a small outpost, seemed to be human made in structure and design, but something seemed off about it. Nevertheless, it had breathable air and a ventalation system that caused no difficulties in respiration to him. He wandered the base, before finding a few crates of tubed food and an all black spacesuit clearly labelled as such, with several zipup pockets on the legs, along with two oxygen tanks, but this, unlike the base, didn't seem like it could've come from Earth at all, except for the fact that it seemed designed for a human. But he put it on, knowing that he'd need to venture out to have the best chance of finding out what exactly was going on. Finding another convenient surprise in the form of a drivable craft in a garage of sorts, with an airlock, He stuffed 2 crates of food into what seemed to be the trunk of the craft, and, after a half an hour of fiddling with the controls, found some voice operated auto-pilot like feature. Directions written in plain English. Odd. But, deciding questioning things wouldn't get him anywhere just yet, Dewmann turned the car on with a key right on the driver's seat before hopping back out and hitting a button next to the first airlock door. "TO CANCEL AIRLOCK OPENING, PRESS THE STARTUP BUTTON AGAIN." A robotic voice chimed from speakeres Dewmann couldn't see. "AIRLOCK OPENING IN TEN SECONDS. PREPARE FOR DEPARTURE." Getting back inside the vehicle, and preparing to leave, Dewmann watched the airlock hatch open, with a whirring noise, before the vehicle automatically moved into the chamber. The hatch closed, and the depressurization process (Or whatever. He couldn't remember exactly how airlocks worked right about now.) finished shortly, before the outer hatch opened up, and Dewmann caught his first sight of the Martian surface, before saying "Go straight ahead."

That was a week ago.

When he set out, Dewmann had hoped that after a few hours of searching, he could return to the outpost and find a way to refill his oxygen tanks before starting out again. No such luck. A sandstorm caused him to lose his way, and the vehicle had no navigation system that he could find. He would stop every 2 hours or so, and take some of the freeze dried tube food, which was specially designed to somehow work through his suit. He couldn't explain the process, it was completely alien, fitting the setting he was in. But, at the very least, he had food, enough to last him about a week. The suit, connected with the oxygen tanks had a display showing the estimated amount of air Dewmann had left. Amazingly, he had about a week's worth of the stuff. He was relieved that he had that much time during the first few days, but after that while and no sign of anyone else, he was worried. Would he die out here? Alone? Never to be found? He tried to brush the thought away, but it ate away at him for the next couple of days as his voice instructed the vehicle to go whichever way his gut instructed. But the thoughts of death kept eating away at him, until on the seventh day of travelling, another storm hit. This one rocked the vehicle and it all of a sudden shut down. He couldn't get it started again, and now here he was, frantically pounding on the hood, shouting, fearing for his life. He checked the display of the amount of oxygen left; roughly 5 hours worth.
Odds weren't looking too good for Dewmann. He started to panic, and ran to the back of the craft, throwing the two crates of food out onto the red, sandy, ground. He grabbed as many tubes as he could, even though he wouldn't be able to eat all of it in 5 hours. He looked back in the trunk and found a strange sidearm not of the planet Earth he hadn't noticed when he put the crates of food in the trunk back at the outpost, as well as some of what appeared to be it's ammunition. He took those as well as the gun of course, and put them in the same pouches of his spacesuit he put the food in, before sprinting off shouting for anyone. "HELP! OH PLEASE GOD HELP!"

"Give up and come out with your hands over your head or we will open fire on the house." said a voice from outside.

Someguy went up to the door and opened it just enough to get a peek at outside, but not enough so the turtles could see him. Esbiate was right; they have indeed surrounded the house. However, he forgot to give the rest of the group two important details. The first was that the turtles seemed to be armed with what looks like guns, and they were all aiming the front door.

The second is that they also had a tank. Even thought it looked like a big blue shell on wheels with a silver cannon perched in front of it, it was nonetheless a tank.

Someguy could've sworn he also heard a faint "help", but he dismissed it.

Tuomey took all this in stoically, his expression not changing.
He turned to the ninja and said "Well, f---------------------------ck. I can try and make a small mini-hurricane, but it's not my speciality.. Wait, if anyone who needs it puts on some breathing gear I can rush all the air out of the cave. That would do it, right? Just hang on."

Tuomey readied his staff, adjusting a cog and pointing it at the centre of the roof and said "On your mark, JT. Everyone make sure you're holding on to something so you don't get shot out too."

JT nodded toward Tuomey. He would not need air to breathe, so he helped the others with their breathing apparatuses first, in flagrant disregard of airline safety protocol. He readied himself as he approached the door. "The dust should provide some cover, but it will also build up static, and static leads to static discharge." After making sure the others were firmly attached to something that wouldn't move, he forced open the door-stone with a loud shout of "NORRIS KICK!" Just as he did so, he felt himself almost swept out by the huge volume of air the wizard sent out at hurricane speeds. Bounding off the top of what appeared to be a tank-like vehicle, he leaped into the midst of the whirling dust cyclone that now engulfed the area. Visibility 1.2%, his holo-corder read. Perfect.

Focusing the kinetic energy of the moving particles, he descended again to the Martian surface accompanied by a furious rain of lightning bolts. "RAISING STORM!"

When the dust cleared and the others scrambled out, JT was fighting with the driver of the tank-like vehicle, who has just managed to avoid electrocution. The others lay collapsed where they stood; the poor creatures had tried to counter his electric attack with water guns, which had the same effectiveness as urinating on an electric fence. The leader, however, was putting up more of a fight. JT just managed to duck a blast from its rifle, which fired not water but some kind of plasma bolts. The ninja rushed under the next blast and caught his attacker by the collar, unleashing upon him a fearsome barrage of slashing attacks. As he grabbed the leader by the collar once more, all went dark for a brief moment. JT slashed the creature twice more, finally engulfing it in an immense plume of energy which sent it skyward. The ninja remained standing on the tank as the others approached. "Would anyone happen to know how to drive one of these?" he asked. []

"Nicely done. Driving one of these? I'm sure one of us can.." Tuomey said, walking over to the tank followed by Someguy and Esbby, "..but shouldn't we see who that dude is?" he continued, indicating a running, screaming, figure heading towards them.