Favourite Quotes

''Hey Roxanne! My parents are paying for my driving lessons as soon as I graduate! Just think...in a year from now, I'll be a public danger...''

-Me, to my cousin

Go here, laugh


"I hope I die before I get old!"
- What do you mean you don't know? Get out! Go on, shoo!
Take your fail with you!

"I'm sick of this place. How about we go for a ride?" -Bully
"You like that car more than me!" - Pretty girl
"Who's talking about cars?" - Bully with suggestive tone

I love you, Batman Beyond.

"There was a young vampire named Mabel,
Whose periods were incredibly stable,
Every full-moon,
She’d sit with a spoon,
And eat herself under the table."

I don't know where from but wow

This happened this morning:

Mother: Here. *hands vitamin tablet*
Me: (sarcastically) Are these the ones that make you lose all your testosterone?
Mother: (without hesitation or any note of sarcasm) No, that's these. *points to other bottle*

[]

When I feel like annoying my sister Catherine, I can become quite original.

Me: Catherine! Catherine!
Cat: Shut up! (I've been annoying her for a while)
M: Catherine! Catherine! Catherine! Catherine! CATHERINE! CATHERINE! CATHERINE!
C: WHAT?!
M: (shows her a can of fruit juice) IT'S FRUIT JUICE! But it's also a GRENADE! (quickly pulls off the plastic band with one finger and pretends to throw the can)

M: (sings to the beat of "Milkshake" by Kelis) My glasses brings all the girls to the yard
And they're like 'It's better than yours'
Damn right, it's better than yours
I can glass you, but I have to charge
Nah nah, nah nah nah! Glass it up!
C: Aw, shut up!

(my sister is looking at herself in the mirror of the bathroom. I barge in without warning)
M: Pokemons are going to eat us all! (leaves as quickly as I came)
C: ...what the hell?

How do you fit five Bulbasaurs and two Charizards onto a bus?

You poke 'em on!

"BIRD! BIRD! KILL IT! IT'S EVIL!"

"I'minspace."

(Both by Portal 2 characters who shall remain nameless for their own protection)

also, the entire Portal 2 credits song. So awesome.

"All the killer Military androids have been taught to read and given a copy of the "Laws of Robotics"..........to share."

Man so much stuff in Portal 2 is so Quotable, I been not wanting to quote so much as to not give away anything.

"Oh, yes. Those chickens are up to summat".

--Chicken Run

In case of implosion, look directly at it.

-Aperture Science Security.

Alright, so early this morning before 1st period, I'm hanging out with a llarge group of friends, a couple of which are discussing how one needs to research revolution. He brought up the Russian Revolution to another, and she responded with a blank stare.
While some people might have facepalmed and her lack of knowledge of the subject, I took the time to explain it to her in the simplest terms I could think of.

"Did you ever see the movie 'Anastasia?'"

"Yeah."

"It's like that, but she dies. Also, there's no zombie Rasputin."

I should have added "That we know of." At the end of that, but whatever.

"There is nothing more deadly than a russian with two AA-12"

-FPSRussia

I love Anastasia.

I know, it's sad to know that she died along with the rest of the family.
Oh yeah, IRL SPOILER ALERT!

Really? In that case the film is ruined for me.

"April showers bring May flowers. Mayflowers bring pilgrims. Pilgrims bring Smallpox."
Failbook.

(A picture of the Royal couple is shown)

''Dear Europe, please explain why we should care. Signed, America.''
''Dear America, you shouldn't. We don't even care about it ourselves. Signed, Europe.''

-Two 4chan posts

I love 4chan. And..ponychan...

Anyway portal!

Portal 2;

Spoiler:

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Spoiler:

Portal 1;

"Unbelievable. You, [subject name here], must be the pride of [subject hometown here]!"

"Have I lied to you? [pause] I mean, in this room? Trust me, leave that thing alone."

"I'd just like to point out that you were given every opportunity to succeed. There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to. I invited your best friend the Companion Cube. Of course, he couldn't come because you murdered him. All your other friends couldn't come either, because you don't have any other friends. Because of how unlikeable you are. It says so here in your personnel file: Unlikeable. Liked by no one. A bitter, unlikeable loner whose passing shall not be mourned. 'Shall not be mourned.' That's exactly what it says. Very formal, very official. It also says you were adopted. So that's funny, too."
Spoiler to portal 2 -

Spoiler:

"Not in cruelty
Not in wrath
The REAPER came today
An ANGEL visited
this gray path
And took the cube away."

-Graffiti from Rat Man

"Because I could not stop for Death,
He kindly stopped for me;
The cube had food and maybe ammo.
And immortality."

"He died!? But this is supposed to be a kids' movie!"

--Muppet Treasure Island

Oh, man, that movie is full of good quotes.

Statler: Waldorf, you old fool! We're heroes! We saved the pig and the frog!
Waldorf: Well, it was too late to save the movie!

Rizzo: What's wrong?
Gonzo: It just feels so weird.
Rizzo: You mean that Mr. Arrow's dead?
Gonzo: Yeah, that... and my pants are filled with starfish.
Rizzo: You and your hobbies.

Statler: "Take a cruise," you said. "See the world," you said. Now here we are, stuck on the front of this stupid ship.
Waldorf: Well, it could be worse. We could be stuck in the audience.

Jim Hawkins: Here you go, your bread and water for the day.
Mad Monty: But I ordered shrimp scampi!

Unfortunately I want to watch Treasure Planet again now. >_<

Portal 2:

Spoiler:

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"We've all got skelotons in the closet, keep it up and I'll yours to mine."
"I can read your mind, not alot goin' on in there."
"I can shoot the wings off a fly, imagine what I can do to you."
-Nova, Starcraft 2
"Just call me when the swelling goes down. On second thought, just call me."
"Ouch that looked like it hurt. Next!"
"Theres a Protoss who needs mouth-to-mouth... oh, well, mouth-to-something..."*
"If I do this wrong, this will hurt a little. If I do it right, it'll hurt alot."
"Congatuations! Your my first paitent!"
"Oh, MEDIC!"
-Medic Starcraft 2
"Hurry up. What are ya, missn' a leg or someth- oh."
"Attention passengers, the local time doesn't matter scene you'll all be dead soon anyway."
"WE'RE HIT! WE'RE HIT! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! Ha ha ha, just kidding. You sholda seen the looks on your faces."
"Suck it up! You're acting like if you got BOTH arm blown off."
"I've exorzided the demons!"
"Go into the light..."
"MEDIC!"
-Medivac Starcraft 2
"THESE JETS ARE BURNNIGN MY A**!"
"I aint got time ot bleed."
"When you can't get it cheaper, call the Reaper."
"I bring in the pain and the pizza in under 30 minets, or it's free."
"I signed up to be a Repo man, imagine my surprize."
-Reaper Starcraft 2
"Did you see that?*Pause* Exacxtly."
"Today's forcast, extra bomby, with a chance of mushrum clouds."
"I see live people. *Gunshots* Now I see dead people."
"When I see world untouched by war, a world of inocnce, lush forest and clear rivers, I really just want to nuke the c*** out of it."
"You got something on your face.*Gunshot* Got it.
-Ghost Starcraft 2
"FEAR is an illusion."
-Dark Templar Starcraft 2
"Why am I stuck in this chicken *beep* outfit?"
Marine Starcraft 1

*For those who don't know was a Protoss lookes like:

Spoiler: