Favourite Quotes

You get awesome-karma.

Double Karma!
I love that song!

"While I subscribe to the ‘many worlds’ theory, which posits the existence of an infinite number of Sheldons in an infinite number of universes, I assure you that in none of them, am I dancing."
["Are you fun in any of them?"]
"The math would suggest that in a few I'm a clown made of candy."

Sheldon Cooper, Big Bang Theory

"OH, BITCH, BITCH, BITCH!" Abraham Simpson, mocking angst.

Gorgro wrote:"While I subscribe to the ‘many worlds’ theory, which posits the existence of an infinite number of Sheldons in an infinite number of universes, I assure you that in none of them, am I dancing."
["Are you fun in any of them?"]
"The math would suggest that in a few I'm a clown made of candy."

Sheldon Cooper, Big Bang Theory

More Karma!

"I'm gonna need more rope."-Candle Jack, curiosity of Tacoli

"I mean, just look at the exclamation marks in that last paragraph! How can it not be exciting? It can't not be definitely not be not exciting, that's how!"

Email from an upcoming game called "DeathSpank". I already forgot i subscribed to it, but it looks awesome and funny and it's made by the guy from Monkey Island. How can this not be exciting? THEY'RE NOT RELEASING IT FOR PC ANYMORE, DAMMIT. *rages*

"What will the download size be for DeathSpank? - Twelve and a half Steves. Prove me wrong."

Part of the game's FAQ section

*Went shopping with dearest mother. When we reached the mall, Mother started tinkering with the GPS*

GPS (In British accent) - "You have reached your destination. Depart (Louder) Depart![i] (Still louder) DEPART![i]"

You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.

- Homer Simpson

"Hey Baker Lady! Gimme Ten Pies!"

-Wario in 'Warioware Touched!'

Wario is deliciously nasty.


"Spam, spam, junk...........*GASP*! The very last pygmy rhino is going extinct!? Unless it gets my credit card number!?"


"What's going on here!? According to my illegal keylogging software, you've all been giving out personal information over the internet!"

Why is it that nobody remembers the name of Johann Gambolputty de von
Ausfern-schplenden-schlitter-crasscrenbon-fried-digger-dingle-dangle-
dongle-dungle-burstein-von-knacker-thrasher-apple-banger-horowitz-
ticolensic-grander-knotty-spelltinkle-grandlich-grumblemeyer-
spelterwasser-kurstlich-himbleeisen-bahnwagen-gutenabend-bitte-ein-
nurnburger-bratwustle-gernspurten-mitz-weimache-luber-hundsfut-
gumberaber-shonedanker-kalbsfleisch-mittler-aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm?


[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/v/HevM-35hJUE&hl=en_US&fs=1&[/youtube]

Johnston: Oh, Oliver, would you stop that.

Old Man Oliver: Sorry, Johnston. Thought you were Aliens. Well, we're under attack, by Aliens. Don't you know that?

Johnston: Yes, we do. That's why we're here. Do you have your Ham radio?
Old Man Oliver: Yeah, for you....50 cents.


-x-

Eric: Do you realize a nuclear bomb went off yesterday?

Pool Player: So? If I'm going to die in a nuclear blast, so be it. I'll be right here, playing pool with my buddies.

Eric: But you're not going to die in a blast. You're going to get radiation poisoning. Within the first couple of hours you're going to be vomiting and have crippling diarrhea. Your hair is going to fall out in chunks. Your skin is going to blister. Your internal organs are going to start to shut down. Because, well, frankly....they're being cooked from the inside. You're going to get sicker and sicker until you can't move. And then you will die. Over there on the floor by the pool table....with your buddies.


-Jerico

"Who said that? WHO THE FUCK SAID THAT? WHO'S THE SLIMY LITTLE COMMUNIST SHIT TWINKLED TOED COCKSUCKER DOWN HERE, WHO JUST SIGNED HIS OWN DEATH WARRENT?" Gunnery Sergeant Hartman.

"Hey, I think he died! Are you dead?"

- Conker to the player if the controller is left alone in "Conker's Bad Fur Day"

I love that game.

"Doesn't that just give me the screaming red ass"

Another plumber in a supply house today,

Conker's Bad Fur Day looks to be in hilariously bad taste. Incidentally, if you don't do anything for 3 minutes on Sonic CD, Sonic will get bored, run off and end the game.

Jonny, have you ever played CBFD?

It's hilariously bad taste from beginning to end.

That's why I love it.

I'm reading about it now! It looks great, but I'm annoyed at the changes they made to the remake and the original is on N64....

“I’d like to get this DVD for my son.” *hands me a copy of Watchmen*

“How old is your son, ma’am?

“Five.”

“Sorry, this film isn’t suitable for your son.”

“But it’s about superheroes! How can a film about superheroes be unsuitable for kids?”

“There is a scene where one of the heroes cuts a man’s head in half with a meat cleaver.”

“What, are they thick or something? How could you put that in a kid’s film?”

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

-Albert Einstein

Oh dear. Superhero Film Woman needs to do her research.

All dwarfs are by nature dutiful, serious, literate, obedient and
thoughtful people whose only minor failing is a tendency, after one
drink,
to rush at enemies screaming "Arrrrrrgh!" and axing their legs off at
the
knee.

- Guards! Guards!

...not sure I'm ever going to quote anything apart from Pratchett.

Stan: Steve, I'm going to motivate you the same way the CIA motivates its assassins. You know, when they have trouble asking out a girl. *Puts a collar around Steve's neck* There. If you don't ask Debbie out in 24 hours, the collar will sense your stress level and blow up.

Steve: Blow up?!

Stan: Oops, accidentally set it for 24 minutes. Oh, man, you better run.

-American Dad, The American Dad After School Special episode