Some people are just intially good at Minecraft. I sure has heck wasn't, but I've improved. I'm STILL building blocky houses and have trouble gettign the nerve to explore caves, but I have grown to love the frequent stumbles, because I know that in all of these ways that I fail, I know what to improve.
I understan the issue of finding iron, sometimes veins get hard to come by, but strip mineing and making a bit of a web out of your mine will greatly increase your chances of finding stuff. Store all things that do not have a functionallity other than crafting in a chest, it won't do any good and if you die, say goodbye to that material.
I also recomend picking a spot that already has bare rock already reveiled. Those are really easy to find ore in, because you have a bit of pathline to follow.
Also, use charcoal ALWAYS above coal in furnaces. It's perfectly renewable and it works the same. Save coal for torchs.
Make your mines have only one, very protected entrence. Creepers are pro pathers, they will be able to find ways to you that are far outside their sight range to find you. Having one under your house is a good plan, depending on where you're building. There are the creepy ambences that will activatie sometimes, but that's one of the only drawback.
Do everything in your power to make your house mob proof. Put a pressure plate on the inside side of your doorway, the door will open when you are leaving and close it behind you, and when you come back you don't have to think about closeing the door. A glass ring on the walls of your house will keep spiders from gettign to any roof entrences and still discourage zombies and the such from trying to come in. A fence will do perfectly for most mobs too.
ALWAYS place your door down when your on the side that you will be coming IN, not out. Creepers would make love to a door placed from the side you will come out 'twere it a creature. Creepers get stuck there, and you can't do anythign to get them out other than to go out and kill them with a sword, which will probly backfire.
Sneakwalk around you're house. Creepers can't see through glass and will only know you're in there is if they hear you. And if they can hear you, they won't stop trying to get in. EVER.
That's all I have for now. Hope you get back into playing Minecraft sometime, once you get the hang of it, it'll be really, really fun.